My Bucket List II
A few years back, I remember bringing my cg and treating them to watch the movie, 'The Bucket List' and subsequently posted some of my thoughts here. I have since not treated my subsequent cgs (or LG now) to any movies. Think it will remain that way but my current LG has gotten better treats. This movie was screened in last year's ID2010 conference and we were asked to watch the movie from the perspective of a disciple and a disciplemaker.
In some sense this post seeks to complete, after so many years, the post that I have not been able to articulate well then. In other sense, it is inspired by a series of messages that I heard online about unresolved conflicts in the family. It triggered me to look back at this movie again because I was reminded of Jack Nicholson's character in the movie, who had an estranged relationship with his daughter, only to find themselves reconciled towards the end of the movie. That was one of the most touching part of the story, together with his eulogy for Morgan's death.
Perhaps another way to ask the question is to ask what do I not want to regret when it's time for me to kick the bucket. Generically speaking, some of these things which I don't want to regret not doing or being include:
1. Church planting and the fulfillment of the Great Commission
2. Restoring broken past relationships
3. Resolve any unresolved issues within myself
4. Stepping out to take risk for God and people
5. Write a book?
6. Marry a wife?
7. Pastor a church?
8. Lead a ministry?
There may be other things, but at this stage, I need to realise that the list is still pretty much vague and broad and even towards the spectrum of immaturity. But certainly, I believe that at the end of our lives, we will not want to leave any broken relationships or unresolved conflicts to remain as status quo. This thought sprouted from a recent incident. A broken friendship in the past came back to haunt me over the past few weeks. While I dun think the two of us are bearing grudges over history, it tends to stir up some emotions within myself when I start thinking about the friendship. I believe it is more or less resolved and the friendship is more or less catching up on lost time. I seriously think it was God's intervention which made this possible, as he forced me to put down all past hurts and be ready to confront the reality of reconciliation as spoken in His word in Matthew 5, when He commands us to leave the offering at the table and go reconcile. In this case, He made me do it. I can safely say that I have overcome these past hurts with regards to this friendship but I can also safely say that I believe there are other issues within myself that needs to be resolved. Most of these may boil down to resentment and once again, I will see that God will find means to bring about healing and reconciliation.
I write all these not to impress upon people on anything. The fact that I link resolution of past issues and our bucket list is because I dun want to regret unhealed relationships and heart issues. In relationships, there will be one day when either one of us will be six feet above the other. Do we want to live with the regrets in our hearts that such hurts remain unresolved? In our inner mess, not resolving them will just prove to be a curse for the rest of our lives and I certainly don't want to look back when I'm on my deathbed and see that some stuff are the direct consequences of these unresolved inner mess.
That's why this will be an integral part of my bucket list.
In some sense this post seeks to complete, after so many years, the post that I have not been able to articulate well then. In other sense, it is inspired by a series of messages that I heard online about unresolved conflicts in the family. It triggered me to look back at this movie again because I was reminded of Jack Nicholson's character in the movie, who had an estranged relationship with his daughter, only to find themselves reconciled towards the end of the movie. That was one of the most touching part of the story, together with his eulogy for Morgan's death.
Perhaps another way to ask the question is to ask what do I not want to regret when it's time for me to kick the bucket. Generically speaking, some of these things which I don't want to regret not doing or being include:
1. Church planting and the fulfillment of the Great Commission
2. Restoring broken past relationships
3. Resolve any unresolved issues within myself
4. Stepping out to take risk for God and people
5. Write a book?
6. Marry a wife?
7. Pastor a church?
8. Lead a ministry?
There may be other things, but at this stage, I need to realise that the list is still pretty much vague and broad and even towards the spectrum of immaturity. But certainly, I believe that at the end of our lives, we will not want to leave any broken relationships or unresolved conflicts to remain as status quo. This thought sprouted from a recent incident. A broken friendship in the past came back to haunt me over the past few weeks. While I dun think the two of us are bearing grudges over history, it tends to stir up some emotions within myself when I start thinking about the friendship. I believe it is more or less resolved and the friendship is more or less catching up on lost time. I seriously think it was God's intervention which made this possible, as he forced me to put down all past hurts and be ready to confront the reality of reconciliation as spoken in His word in Matthew 5, when He commands us to leave the offering at the table and go reconcile. In this case, He made me do it. I can safely say that I have overcome these past hurts with regards to this friendship but I can also safely say that I believe there are other issues within myself that needs to be resolved. Most of these may boil down to resentment and once again, I will see that God will find means to bring about healing and reconciliation.
I write all these not to impress upon people on anything. The fact that I link resolution of past issues and our bucket list is because I dun want to regret unhealed relationships and heart issues. In relationships, there will be one day when either one of us will be six feet above the other. Do we want to live with the regrets in our hearts that such hurts remain unresolved? In our inner mess, not resolving them will just prove to be a curse for the rest of our lives and I certainly don't want to look back when I'm on my deathbed and see that some stuff are the direct consequences of these unresolved inner mess.
That's why this will be an integral part of my bucket list.
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